patience, young skywalker.

i know its a virtue. i jus dont think i have that particular one.
something is coming. slowly. i would like it to be here. i know its probably better this way. but i still wish the process could speed up a bit. i think im ready for something new. something exciting. something fun.
and then there are days when i realize how much of a mess i am and how comfortable in my own skin right where i am how i am. what would i do with something new? why am i in such a hurry? cuz really im still working on being ok right here right now jus how i am.
this is gonna be good.

monday monday.

i almost slept through my only class of the day this morning. i hold firmly to the opinion that it wasnt my fault. surprisingly, my whole day wasnt completely thrown off. i made it to class, mailed out the ASCE annual reports, ran two miles and worked out, delivered our steel to the machining company, mailed out my resume to six companies, and finished my ethics homework. i might have even made a couple people smile. all in all not a bad day. for a monday.

ramblings of a graduating senior.

i dont know exactly how i feel about growing up and graduating and getting a real job and turning into a real person. i dont really know how to find a job, or an apartment, or what to do about friendships and relationships i have founded in college after graduation. i dont know where i want to live, or exactly what i want to do. but i do know that nothing good can come of jus sitting on your butt and hoping that everything works out.
so for that reason, when my body decided that 715 on a saturday morning was a great time to be wide awake, i figured i should make the most of the time. so i tweaked my resume, put into a .pdf format, and wrote six cover letters to send to various companies.
i still have mixed emotions about growing up, im only hoping that this is the right way to find a job, and i still worry about whether or not ill be able to maintain my college relationships that i have put so much effort into forming and that i cherish so much. these companies could send me pretty much anywhere, and have me do pretty much anything.
the joy in all of this is that God is in control, and He will take my efforts, mulitply them and have everything work out according to His plan. I dont have to have it all together right now, and i probably never will. and i'm ok with that. Jesus loves me, and that is more than enough :)

i win.

you would think that after two losses in the regular season, the ravens would have been a little more prepared for their third defeat on Sunday. Here we go AGAIN... Pittsburgh's goin to the SuperBowl! :)

down and dirty.

so we're building this steel bridge for our senior design project. we spent all last semester designing it, analyzing it, realizing that it wouldn't work, redesigning it... you get the idea. we finally got to the point right at the end of the semester where we were able to estimate the amount of steel we would need and order it. it came in over break. the boys went and picked it up, and its been waiting down in the shop for us to have enough space and enough of a plan to actually start working on it.
we spent a good part of the past week clearing space, picking old tape up off the floor, and laying out the new 'river' over which our bridge will go. we're starting off a little bit slow, but are hoping that things will pick up in the next couple of days as we figure out what has to happen first in the process of actually doin all the hands-on work that will (in theory) create a bridge. its a messy process at times, but we're havin fun with it :)

i wanna go home!

it is -9 in Beaver Falls this morning. windchill of -21.
Greybull WY is enjoying a balmy 12 degrees with no windchill.
im jealous.

close but no cigar.

today was almost a really bad day.
i woke up and had to go to polisci at 8am.
we decided to grab coffee between classes. i realized i had lost both my ID and the $15 i had put in my pocket before i left the apt.
we were late to our next class.
i couldnt mail the things i had to mail.
i yelled at a good friend of mine.
i had to get a temporary id from the lady i dont really like.
this was all before 11am.
then my day started to turn around.
my friend that i had yelled at met me for lunch and swiped for me.
he fell down in the snow and made me laugh :)
i found my id. on my desk. (apparently it never made it to my pocket this morning.)
i got a funny email. i laughed out loud.
i got a big bear hug from two great friends.
i wrote a $2 check to mail what needed mailed.
i am going to take a nap.
only my $15 is gone.
life isnt really so bad.

home? again.

i jus got home. i jus left home. this is a little confusing. im hoping eventually this will all work itself out.
as of yesterday, there was nothing on my to-do list.
today was the first day of classes. my last first day of classes.
my to-do list is growing already.
im watching greek instead of anything productive :)