Friday, October 30, 2009

actually, it was a sneaker.

there is a new guy at work. well, i guess he's been here for a few weeks now but thats besides the point because since i've been here longer so i can call him the new guy :)
anyway - the only reason i mention him is that (to add to my list of famous people that my coworkers remind me of) he could have been the voice of Froggy from the Little Rascals.
i'm not even kidding. he sits at the cubicle on the other side of the divider from me in the structures department, and every time he asks Tim a question, i have to stifle my giggles. he kind of looks like Froggy too. it kind of creeps me out. i think i liked it better when Allison sat there.

Monday, October 26, 2009

sprouted.

i am growing strawberries. or at least i am attempting to. there are those that tell me its too late in the season to actually grow them. i of course am choosing to ignore them and press on in my own little world. they live in a cute little pot on my windowsill. i water them every day to keep the soil moist cuz thats what the distructions told me to do. i took this picture on the first day that a tiny little spot of green pushed its way up out of the dirt. (its kind of hard to spot, but trust me its there)
over the weekend, another sprout came up to keep the first company. it makes me feel a little more accomplished and domestic, especially on the days when i can only muster up enough energy to put a couple frozen waffles in my toaster and call it dinner.

Friday, October 23, 2009

seriously?

i glanced at the office phone list today. i do this often, just to see which people i know. today, i saw a new name.

April Showers.

no lie. who does that?

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

a long post about a table.

one of the last things on my list of "essential items that i need for my apartment" (right under toilet paper and a mini baby pumpkin) was a table and chairs. i could get the ones i wanted from walmart.com, which made them the least amount of hassle to obtain. so i lived for the first few weeks in my apartment eating on the floor in front of my couch using magazines as coasters. it was working pretty well for me, but i figured that if i ever wanted to invite anyone over to see my apartment they might not appreciate the japanese style dining.
so i ordered them. and i waited. and just when i thought i might bust from waiting, i got an email saying they had made it to the store (free shipping site-to-store!) and i could come pick them up anytime.
i spent a good deal of time talking myself in and out of going to pick them up by myself. it was sure to be a heavy, awkwardly large box that would be easier to handle with a friend. but all my friends were far away and unable to come for the evening. so i figured that i am a single woman living on my own and a very capable one at that. i went to walmart.
the nice man put my table on a dolly and helped me to my car with it. it was an interesting battle to finangle the 3x4 foot box into the cavalier whose trunk wont open, but we managed to make it work:




it wasnt until i made it back to my apartment that i fully realized exactly what i had gotten myself into. here i am, a 5' 2.5" tall, 120 pound woman living in a second floor apartment, with a 3x4 foot 101 pound box to heft out of my car and up a flight of steps. this was starting to seem like a not-so-good idea. but i had a point to prove - i am a capable, industrious, strong single woman - so (after quickly glancing around the parking lot in hopes of seeing a strong man who might be willing to help me) i hefted the monster box out of gretchen and across the short distance to my door. after it took a decent amount of effort just to get the box far enough inside so i could shut the door, my hopes of actually having a table and chairs in my apartment began to waver a little. i ended up flipping the box end over end in order to make slow progress up the stairs. even as i type that, it seems a lot easier said than done. there were a few moments in which my own mortality seemed very real, and one particular moment that i remember thinking that if i were to fall and be crumpled in a heap-o-mando at the bottom of the stairs and allowed this bigger-than-me box to land on top of me, there would be no one to worry about me and no way of anyone knowing that anything was wrong. and even if someone were to come to my rescue, they wouldnt even be able to get in to help me because the door wouldnt open because i and the table in a box would be smushed against it.
at one point, when i was mere inches away from the top of the stairs, i was certain that i was going to just have to let go - i was in pain all over, i was overheating in my hoodie and i couldnt even take a break to take it off, i couldnt budge the box another inch, and my grip on the railing was slipping. i was really hoping for a movie moment where a big strong guy would just ring my doorbell and come to my rescue, but no one came. i have no idea how i got that box up onto the landing, but i did. and it sat there in the middle of my living room. i was too tired and sore to even lift my camera to take a picture of it sitting there. the appropriateness of the sight that greeted me at the top of the stairs - a message of survival and encouragement - was not lost on me :)
the next night (after i had spent the majority of the day popping ibuprofen and recovered a little) i decided to put the thing together. the first chair (out of four) took me an hour to put together. i got better as i went, and had the last chair together in 20 minutes. i was all done in time to watch Glee at nine. i was so proud of myself. theyre so pretty :)i have most recently accesorized them with uber-on-sale placemats in the most gorgeous shade of sage-y green that match my scheme perfectly and look gorgeous against the dark brown fake wood.
come visit anytime. me and my table are ready for you :)

virtual memory.

i have discovered that both i and my laptop are low on virtual memory. my laptop can not hold any more pictures until i delete some of the ones on there. similarly, i cannot remember something new unless i forget something else.
i remembered to buy vitamins.
(just in case i'm not eating quite right all the time)
i forgot to buy the masking tape i needed.
i remembered (on the first day) to take a vitamin.
i forgot to put in my earrings that day.
i remembered my earrings the next day.
i forgot to take my vitamin. (this became a pattern for a while)
i remembered to take my vitamin yesterday.
i forgot my phone at home yesterday.
i remembered my phone today.
i forgot my vitamin today.

you would think that virtual memory wouldnt really matter as much as real memory: since virtual reality isnt really real, is there even any such thing as virtual memory? maybe that is why its so hard to keep enough of - theres just none out there. its all a figment of our imaginations. but if thats the case, then why do i still have no space on my compy?

Thursday, October 15, 2009

sprinkles.

it is raining outside today. the kind of rain that Mr. P would deny as being rain, with his infamous line, 'its not raining til i say its raining!' i guess that would define it as a sprinkle.
Barry (the office manager) brought donuts today. Rose (the most amazing secretary) sent everyone an email to let us know they were in the lunch room. i told myself i didnt want one, didnt need one, reminded myself that i hadnt eaten a donut in years, and vowed to stay out of the lunch room, just in case. i finished my coffee, and had to clean out my mug. i went into the lunch room. i got a donut. cuz it had sprinkles on it. good fall colored sprinkles. they are my downfall, regardless of color.
it is delicious :)

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

burning ducks.

i just reread my last post. i really dont understand why, but it makes me laugh. out loud. every time.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

hitchhikers.

" 'Hey! Do you know any jokes?' I asked him.

He pondered a minute. 'I do know a pretty good joke. Okay: Why do ducks have flat feet, Zippy?'

'Why?'

'To stamp out forest fires.'

I gasped, then nearly fell over laughing. It was the funniest joke I'd EVER heard, and I'd been collecting jokes for a while.

'No wait! There's more. Why do elephants have flat feet?'

I couldn't speak, so Mom asked why.

'To stamp out burning ducks.'

I just collapsed face-first into my coloring book I rolled around in a little ball until tears were running down my face.

George made a sound like a fire truck. 'Emergency! We've got a burning duck down over here!'

Even Dad had to laugh. 'George, you're gonna kill her.'

I finally stretched out on my back and begged for mercy. Hitchhikers. Good Lord. "


-She Got Up Off the Couch

Sunday, October 11, 2009

design on a dime.

looking for a cheap and easy way to make your rental place look more like home? try adding more pictures. personal ones. it is a great Sunday-afternoon-football-watching activity, and will just make you feel better than having a frame on your wall full of black and white shots of picture frame people. somehow their smiles just seem less real and bring less joy than those of people that you love. i printed 82 pictures. i filled three frames. i had a ton left over.
think you're too cool for picture frames? hoping to have a more modern feel to your place? then what you need is office supplies. lots of them. and i'm not just saying that because i have a strange obsession with them: its true.
with just six command hooks, twenty-one binder clips, two paper clips bent into a heart shape (just cuz i ran out of binder clips! *asthmatic gasp!*), and a roll of green ribbon, i was able to create three separate areas of personality.
its very chic, very modern, and very inexpensive - especially since i already had everything that i needed :) printing the pictures was the biggest cost and the biggest hassle... everything else either came out of the trash can that currently holds my desk stuff (until i actually get a desk) and my jolly green box o' craft stuff (p.s. i made my bed just to take this picture)
i need more binder clips. because you can never have too many, and you just never know when they will come in uber handy :)

Thursday, October 8, 2009

hearing impaired.

i've been having trouble with my ears lately. yesterday, i woke up with a killer ache in my left ear. it has since subsided significantly. (how bout that alliteration?) last night, i discovered that the piercing in my right ear is slightly infected, so it hurts a lil every now and then. on top of that, when i sit at my desk with my headphones in, i can only hear about half of what anyone says to me. so when Joan came over this morning, i could have sworn she said to me, "how are you doin, little person?" i looked at her incredulously because she is in fact shorter than me, until she repeated herself. turns out she just wanted to know who the precious baby on my background was. my bad.

Monday, October 5, 2009

little boxes.

on a hillside...

i got several boxes today. they were not made out of ticky tacky and they were not all the same. every box was different, and each contained exciting things. some were small boxes. some were larger. some came with a box inside of another box. (and when it arrived, i smashed it with a hammer!) just kidding.
the smallest of my boxes came to me at work today. it had my new business cards. they have my name on them with E.I.T. after it, and my new work email, and my work phone number too so now i dont really have to learn it, i can just give my card to people who want to call me at work :) im not sure just who that would be, but hey, its an option.


my other box was waiting for me on my doorstep when i got home. it was spray painted orange and yellow on the outside which made me think it might be from my great-aunt Vi, sending me messages and presents from the grave. but even better, it was from my Momma :) and it was full of great things. it had my supersoft pink bunny, a roaster, two metal bowls, four retractable ultra fine sharpies, an eyeliner, and my card that says i am a member of the national wild turkey federation :)



a box within that box held the (finally!) final product of my high school senior project - a professionally bound copy of La Casa que Juan Construyo, illustrated by me :) one copy for me, and a copy for my Spanish teacher. better late than never, right?
and another box inside the box held my very own little george foreman grill! gotta love yardsales :)

i dont think a girl could ask for a better monday :)

Thursday, October 1, 2009

cubicle buddy.

today, i met my cubicle buddy. his name is Paul. i have worked here for almost two full weeks now, and this is the first day that he has been into the office. (apparently he works a lot in one of the Maryland offices.) i kind of wanted to take a picture of him just to prove that he does indeed exist.
unfortunately, i left my camera at home after having it out last night to take a picture of the aliens that were inhabiting the pipe in my utility room. so this is the best i can do:
he reminds me of Eric from That 70's Show. except he's better dressed. he has plants in his cubicle. they're half dead. i feel kind of bad for them, but hey theyre not my plants and i might not be able to keep them alive any better. but his cubicle does have a lot more flair than mine. maybe i'll get a goldfish...




**update: my cubicle buddy did not come back after lunch. im not sure that im entirely convinced he works in two places at once... maybe he is just very sneaky about making it SEEM like he's in two places at once when really he is home napping. maybe that will be my next project to figure out how to make that work for me... or maybe ill stick with the goldfish.