an idiot's guide to theater etiquette.

1. dress the part. if there's ever a good excuse to dress up fancy, its for a trip to the theater. your brand new super flattering dress? wear it. that fancy bridesmaid's dress you never thought you'd ever wear again? wear it. those ties your grandma keeps buying for you? now's your chance to actually wear one. but your soccer warm ups? um, no. your favorite flourescent yellow hoodie? leave it at home.

i'm the one in the flattering new dress taking this unflattering picture. mark is the one not wearing a tie because i'm slowly learning to pick my battles.

2. arrive early. keep in mind, once you get to the theater you'll want time to grab a drink, peruse the merchandise, and use the restroom before finding your seat, so plan to have enough time for that. always a good rule of thumb: if you're on time, you're late.

3. put your camera away. and your stinkin' smart phone too. photography is usually not permitted inside the theater. i know its super tempting because its super exciting and the opening curtain just looks! so! cool! but. the ushers will yell at you. and that is embarrasing. save yourself the embarrasment and take pictures everywhere except in the theater.

like in the lobby, when you're extra early and need to kill some time. ps he's smoking a giant imaginary pipe like a snobby theater-goer. obvsly.

4. find your seats in a timely fashion. if you are tracking with the rules so far, this should be no problem. the problems arise when you arrive late, because once the lights go down it is not only much more difficult to read the letters and numbers on the seats, but also much more likely that your stumbling around in the dark will annoy your fellow theater-goers.

a very abbreviated guide to theater seating:

- rows are labeled alphabetically in ascending order.   

- seats are numbered from left to right facing the stage.

- when in doubt, ask an usher for help.

and for the love of Oz, please enter your row from the correct end so as to minimize the number of people you have to make stand up as you shuffle past. this is not only a pain to those in your row, but also those in the rows behind you who paid to see a show, not the butts of the people in front of them.

THIS is what i came to see

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5. remain seated. yes, the whole time. see above re: shuffling in and out of rows. this is not only disrespectful to those seated around you, but also to the actors on stage. your drink refill is not that important, and it can wait. but if you think otherwise, and you have already arrived late and then left again in the middle of the act, dont be surprised if the ushers refuse to let you back into your row and make you stand. enough is enough.

6. come back after intermission. you guys! intermission wasn't the end! you missed the whole second half of the show! how sad for you...

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7. ENJOY!!! going to the theater is fun! seeing Wicked at the theater for your anniversary is extra-fun! dont be embarrased to lip-sync to all the songs, because chances are at least half of the audience is doing the same thing. i mean, they totally were, right? i wasnt the only one, right?!? eh, i dont even care if i was. it was AH-MAZING!

operation knock-down drag-out: week 6.

so in case you havent noticed already, the general game plan around here is that pretty much nothing bathroom-related gets done in the middle of the week (Tues - Thurs) and most of the significant, amazing, and impressive feats of home improvement are performed over the extended weekend days (Fri - Mon). this week was no exception.

on Friday night, we took a trip to the Depot to pick up the floor tile and a few other related necessities. since the store was mostly empty, i took the opportunity to get a picture of the tile we're using for the floor and in the shower area, since i couldnt find any good pictures online. and also because its way less awkward to be kneeling on the floor of the Depot taking pictures if no one but your husband is around to witness your insanity.

since the rest of Friday evening was spent cheering the O's to victory in the wild card game, the real work started on Saturday. before Mark could start cutting any tiles, we had to mark out some guidelines on the floor, since i wanted the tile to be laid on the diagonal. so here's a real world application for all you math-haters out there: how many engineers with math minors does it take to calculate a whole-number length of the legs on an isosceles triangle that will provide a whole-number length hypotenuse?

we got the answer within 1/32 and called it good enough

mark made all the cuts on the wet saw that he borrowed from his uncle the tile-expert. he had access to another kind of tile cutter that would have made the process faster, but he wasnt happy with the quality of the cuts it was giving him, so he just stopped using it in favor of the wet saw.

Mark didnt end up making as much progress on Saturday as he had hoped to. instead of workworkworking all day, he stopped when he was about halfway done with the cuts to take me out to dinner and the theater for our anniversary! he is seriously the best ever.

on Sunday, Mark finished cutting and dry-fitting all of the tiles, and then started setting them in place.

since he is a genius, he numbered all of the pieces with painters tape before he took them back out of the room. this made putting it all back together super simple, and ensured that all of the time he spent laying them out wasnt a waste of time.

i was busy painting things and doing laundry for most of this time, but i caught up with the process right at the end to take some tile-tutorial pictures for you all.

Step One: spread some mud on the floor.

Step Two: use the trowel to make some lines in the mud.

Step Three: drop a tile into place, pound on it until it is level with the pieces around it. its just that easy!*
*but it might not be. dont take my word for it.

once all the pieces were mudded into place, i made my one and only contribution to the tile-ing process by assisting Mark with cutting the threshold to size. and by "assisting" i probably mean "flashlight holding." but you should never underestimate the effect that good lighting can have when cutting tile, especially at 9:30 on a chilly, rainy Sunday night.

after the threshold was cut, it apparently needed to be polished. so Mark did that last night after work.

and then, after drilling some holes into the tile underneath to give the mud and the threshold something grippier than smooth ceramic tile to hold onto, the threshold got mudded into place! pro tip: do not step on the freshly mudded threshold. it will shift and the hubs will not be happy. (ps i did not step on it, but i was warned ahead of time of the potential for disaster.)

because my hubs is awesome, he worked late into the night (on a work night even!) to get the floor grouted so that this step would be complete, and so he could return all of his uncles tile tools that he had borrowed for the weekend, which stretched into a weekend and a day.

so as of this morning, we now have a beautiful new tile floor in our bathroom! i am so impressed and excited and i cant help but stare lovingly at it every time i walk down the hall.

next up: shower tile? ceiling? i'm actually not sure. but i'll be sure to let you know all about it once i find out.

trips to Home Depot: this week - 1. total - 9.
trips to Ace: this week - 0. total - 2.
trips to Lowes: this week - 0. total - 2.

times Amanda has cried over this project: this week - 0. total - 1.
times Amanda has cried in Home Depot: this week - 0. total - 0.

days until Thanksgiving: 51.

meal plan monday: oct 8.

this weekend was perfect. it was one of those weekends where everything aligns just-so and you are blessed with back-to-back days that are productive and fun and exciting and relaxing and just all around delightful.

baseball was watched. two weeks of laundry got done. projects were finished. laughter and silliness were plentiful. floors were tiled. dinner dates were gone on. musicals were attended! and i promise, there will be detailed posts about ALL of these things later in the week! (except for maybe the laundry, i think that ones pretty self explanatory)

self-portrait in the theater lobby

but all good things must come to an end, and here we are at the beginning of a brand new week. there is work to be done and meals to be planned and tons of potential for the awesomeness of the weekend to continue through the week!

Monday: zuchinni, black bean, and rice skillet.
Tuesday: turkey burgers.
Wednesday: grilled chicken on spinach salad.
Thursday: crock pot butternut squash soup. (recipe)
Friday: tilapia with a veggie.
Saturday: Amber's wedding!
Sunday: veggie omelets.

thing of the week.

last week, mark had to get the oil changed in his car, and he came home from the dealership with a new love. no, not a new car and not a new 'weekend girlfriend'... maybe you should just watch the video because i dont think i have any words to adequately describe this...

ok, so dont tell me we're the only people who think this is absolutely hilarious. Mark spent several HOURS watching this show in the dealership waiting room, and said it was so hard to sit there and stifle his laughter. so of course when he came home he found clips on youtube so he could share the funny with me and laugh as hard as he wanted.

animals. talking. in british accents. you're welcome.

two.

can you believe its been two whole years since i married this hunk?  

i hardly can. when i try to think about it, my brain usually follows one of two trains of thought: either 1) wow, two whole years! thats forever! can you even remember not being married?! or 2) well, we're still learning and trying to figure this all out. after all, we've only been married for two years. its like time has done that weird scrunching thing it does sometimes when an event can somehow seem forever ago but not that long ago all at the same time. does that make any sense at all?

i guess its like this: when i look back over the last two years, i am kind of amazed and impressed at where we were then, and how we have changed as we have navigated through adventures and projects and decisions and plans. but even so, there are some changes that i still have a little bit of trouble with. the most embarrasing? i am still not used to signing my new last name. am i even allowed to call it my "new" last name at this point?

i had my old signature down to a science. it was the perfect blend of speed, aesthetics, and illegibility. i spent years perfecting that capital H followed by the non-descript scribble that upon closer inspection  miraculously incorporated all the right bumps to represent all the right letters.

but getting married changed all that. my "new" last name broke up the smooth flow of my signature, forcing me to slow down and think hard about the mechanics of forming these foreign, tall letters, leaving me frustrated with the elementary, non-cohesive look of the final product. and when i didnt take that time to slow down, that pesky new last name got even worse: it wound up looking less like the last name of my husband, which i willingly and lovingly assumed as my own, and more like a four-letter expletive. awesome.

i've gotten used to a number of things in the past two years of being married (living with a boy, fighting fair, cooking for two, etc) so why can i not get a handle on something as simple, not to mention important, as my own last name?

happy SECOND anniversary, Mark. i love you and i love sharing your last name (and maybe eventually i'll get used to signing it as my own) (hows that for romance?)

operation knock-down drag-out: week 5.

three alternate titles for this week's bathroom update, in order of descreasing levels of restraint:

- DIY: two steps forward, one step back.
- its so pretty, i'm gonna DIE!
- squeeeeeeeeeeilovepaintsomuchaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!

so. i dont know if  you were able to figure it out in the midst of all the squealing, but the big news for this week is that there's paint on the walls!

Mark finished up the last little bit of prep on friday night - sanding all the spackle spots on the walls. he likes to sand with one hand and hold the shop vac with the other hand, to cut down on the amount of dust flying freely through the air. it really does keep the dust pretty well contained, which is nice considering there's currently not a door on the room to keep the rest of the house dust-free.

and then: paint! Mark had time to get a coat of white on the trim around the door, and one coat of color cut in around the ceiling and corners of the room before bedtime on friday.

looks white in the can...

looks AWESOME on the walls!

i kept sneaking back into the bathroom while mark was painting, just to sit on the edge of the tub, watch the paint go up on the walls, and involuntarily squeal every now and then. this picture pretty much shows how my face looked the whole time: crazy and excited.

on Saturday, the plan was for Mark to put a second coat on the trim, finish cutting in all the corners and around the door, and then spend the afternoon/evening at the O's game, and he would trust me to roll on the first coat of color.

but plans changed, the cutting in didnt take as long as we thought it might, and Mark got to do the rolling too before the game, which is probably a good thing, since i probably would have made quite a mess jumping up and down with a roller full of paint.

once the first coat of blue was on the wall, we noticed that there were a few spots that were in need of some spackle touch-ups. womp womp. so now we have to go BACK to the spackle-and-sand step before we can put a second coat of paint on the walls and then move onto the floors. but even with some fresh spackle over the paint, the bathroom is SO MUCH BRIGHTER now than it was before, and i love it so hard. 

but dont you think that mark was the only one working on the bathroom around here this weekend, because i started a new project on sunday afternoon (instead of finishing the three others i have going already...i'm starting to think i have some serious project ADD...) i used four different power tools, turned into a saw-dusty mess, and made some good progress on building some shelves for the bathroom, all while wearing a dress!

Mark offered to help me at one point, but i am determined that this will be my project from start to finish, so i politely declined. (ok maybe it was more like "NO. this is MY project. i'mma do it MYSELF" but thats pretty much the same, right?) if all goes as planned, the shelves are going to look pretty much like this when they are done:

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i think this bathroom has potential to be our most satisfying house project to date. i can't wait to see it all put together.

trips to Home Depot: this week - 0. total - 8.
trips to Ace: this week - 0. total - 2.
trips to Lowes: this week - 0. total - 2.

times Amanda has cried over this project: this week - 0. total - 1.
times Amanda has cried in Home Depot: this week - 0. total - 0.

days until Thanksgiving: 58.

meal plan monday: oct 1.

its october, and part of me is still mourning the passing of summer. and yet, i'm excited about october and all it brings: my anniversary, the hubs' birthday, halloween costumes, pumpkin flavored everything, and surprisingly this year i'm even excited about post-season baseball. here's hoping it lives up to the hype.

source via Pinterest

Monday: veggie omeletes.
Tuesday: crock pot beef burgundy. (recipe)
Wednesday: tilapia with corn.
Thursday: crock pot chicken noodle soup. (recipe)
Friday: turkey burgers.
Saturday: zuchinni, black bean, rice skillet. (recipe)
Sunday: leftovers.