Friday, October 28, 2011

not exactly a party animal.

i am officially the most socially-awkward person i have ever met.

no seriously. you should meet me, and then you would know. when i first meet a person, or am in an unfamiliar situation, or in a large group, my default setting is quiet, shy, and just painfully awkward.

case in point: yesterday's monthly party at work. it was the perfect storm of all three of the situations i just mentioned that make me clam up: since i just switched offices a week ago, i'm perpetually meeting new people, the party was on the first floor of the building (i work on the third, and lets face it the entire building is still new to me), and it was a pretty good sized crowd (even though i'm told the parties drew a much bigger crowd before they stopped providing beer) which means that i was the epitome of awkward.

i knew a grand total of 5 people there (the people from my department) and even when i ran into a guy i knew from college, our conversation went something like this:
me: hey, you work here?
him: yeah, you work here too? cool. where do you live?
me: in maryland.
him: i live in york.
me: cool.
us: *awkward silence, smiles, and head nodding*
and then we walked away from each other and didnt talk any more.

i ate a piece of pizza and a brownie. i stood silently as people around me chatted. i listened to people i dont know (and couldnt really see over the cubicle walls, or really hear over the music on the intercom system) announce some company business, read the suggestions from the suggestion box, and give out the employee of the month award. (surprise! not me.) and then i somehow found my way back to my desk to get my stuff and go home. and that was it. i didn't meet any new people. i didnt hold any conversations that lasted more than 2 minutes. i kept my head down and hightailed it out of there at my first opportunity.

i have a feeling its going to take me awhile to make friends around here.

1 comment:

Abi said...

but every once in a while your true self shines through and they can't help but flock to you like moths to a flame... you made friends before (were even president of the baby pool), you'll make friends here... and maybe someday you'll be employee of the month and suggest beer be reinstated... :)